13th December, 2014. 7:08pm (Manila Time)

Of all the things I don’t miss since I started working from home, it’s commuting. I F**KING HATE TRAVELING WITHOUT A CAR. I’ve been standing here at the jeepney terminal for what seemed like ten years now (*fine, only about an hour) because the line is hella long and traffic is freaking everywhere. I didn’t take a cab because the line is as long and it’s not moving. At least this other public transportation is moving.

And it’s funny, because my sister was actually asking me if I want to get a car of my own. I can’t drive, although last week when we went go karting, I must admit I really had fun. They said I managed to go only two laps, but I don’t care. I enjoyed every minute of it. I told her that if driving was just that easy, then I can definitely handle it. That’s why she was asking me if I want to get a car. I said I don’t, because if I have my own car, I know my Dad will just borrow it every day and let IT ride in there. I’m never giving them that satisfaction. Besides, I don’t want to drive around Manila. Traffic is horrible here. I don’t want to succumb to that.

I guess I should blame myself for going out today. I wanted to go to the mall so I can claim my discount card with two local bookstores. **Fine, it’s actually just an excuse to go book shopping. I don’t regret that, though-book shopping-I was actually able to buy SIX new books: Letters to the Dead, Tiger Lily, A Thousand Pieces of You, Falling Into Place, Me Before You, and The First Phone Call from Heaven. How much did it cost me? Maybe about 70USD more or less? What can you say, the girl loves her books more than Christmas shopping.


So I arrived at home at 7:50. Traffic was already light when it was my turn to ride the jeep, which I was so thankful for. When I arrived, I ate the Chinese takeout I brought home for me and Dad. We were alone at home. I love moments like this. The house is so peace and quiet. No unwanted borders. No noisy brats around. I wish it’s always like this here.

Anyway, while we were having dinner, he asked me if I want to follow my sister to America. In my mind, of course I’d say yes, but I also know that it’s not gonna be that easy, so I just shrugged. Then, he told me something that really irks me. He said, “why don’t you find a suitor with an American citizenship so it’ll be easy for you to go there, too?” I seriously wanna smack him in the head when he said that. I mean, why is everyone so keen in making you find a foreigner (someone with an American citizenship, specifically) so “you can go the United States?” I know it’s “AMERICA”, I just hate it when people think of it as a prerequisite to “getting rich.”

I love more than anything to come to the US with my sister, so we can both work on petitioning my brother and his family there. However, if I’m gonna do it, I’m gonna do it right. I won’t do it “just for the sake of.” If I don’t know any better, I’d say he’s just inching to kick me out of the house. To be honest, I can’t wait to move out of here, too and live independently.

Speaking of independent living, my sister told me to apply for a working visa already. I know she wants me out of the house, too, but I didn’t know that she wants me to move out of the country with her. I don’t know how’s that possible, but I told her I will try to ask my clients. Maybe they’ll be kind enough to grant me a working visa. I really hope they would. But until that happens, I can say that I’m happy here in my home country for now… Even if things are really shitty all the time.






3 thoughts on “I.HATE.CHRISTMAS.RUSH.

    • Every country has its great and ugly side, and it’s just so annoying and sad that people think that the US is like Disneyland where everything’s magical and all. They don’t realize that you still need to work your ass off to be able to have a better life.


      • Everything here is expensive, but min. wage is very little, so that doesn’t help people who work 16 or 18 hour days at a min. wage job get ahead. I feel really sad for the people who have a huge student loan and can only get min. wage jobs, but have a big debt to pay off. By the way, my kids have never even been to Disneyland – we couldn’t ever afford to go. 🙂



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