Black Hole

10th December, 2014. 3:32pm

NaBloPoMo, Wednesday, December 10, 2014

Do you think you maintain a good balance of making yourself happy while making other people happy?

vortex_art

Happiness, like grumpiness, is like a black hole:
When you get sucked into it, it’s possible you feel the same way afterwards.
Photo c/o: membean.com

Seeing how introverted I am, not many people knows how awesome I am. I mean, if you talk to my closest relatives and siblings, they’d probably tell you I’m lying, that I’m actually not a “quiet, shy girl.” But if you ask some of my friends, I’m sure they’ll agree and say, “yup, that about sums her up.” However, the question here isn’t whether it’s true or not. The question is if I make myself happy while making other people happy. The answer to that is I DON’T KNOW.

I like seeing the happy faces that my nephew, nieces and siblings give when we’re together and we buy them things that makes them happy; it makes me happy, too. Even if that means giving out everything I have left, yes, it does make me happy. Does that mean that my future is happy about it, as well? That I’m not sure.

I’ve been working since 2006 barely two months after graduating in college, which means that I’ve been a slave for 8 years now and since then, I still haven’t saved a single cent for myself. Why? Because I have responsibility at home that I need to fulfill. And I’m not complaining. Truly, I’m not. I can still buy the things I want, I just don’t have enough funds (yet) to live in peace in the future. Sometimes, it makes me feel miserable, like I wasted (been wasting) 8 years slaving myself for nothing.

Which, of course, is not true. I was able to buy my iPod, my iPhone, my laptop, camera, all those books, and everything that I own without asking my Dad or anyone else for help. I was able to get the kind of room that I wanted without having the need to withdraw money from the bank account my Mom left me when she died. I’m able to buy my nephew and nieces whatever they want and still have enough money left to pay our bills and buy groceries for the month. They may not be enough for my future (for now), but they sure make the most important people in my life incredibly happy. And that, my friends, makes me happy, too.

KTHXBYE.

 

Jhack

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